Bad Romance
by Lola Kristy
Summary: Lavi's latest attempt at wooing  or annoying  the mysterious Kanda with a loud karaoke - lyrics missing - rendition of some of Lady Gaga's Bad Romance. Shonen-ai. T to be safe because i'm unsure of ratings. One-shot for boredom.


**I've been reading so much angst about these two and so many random comedy fluff pieces that i felt like writing my own. so here's my fail attempt of it...it's Lavi's latest attempt to woo the mysterious Kanda with a loud rendition of some Gaga. **

**Songs: Bad Romance by Lady Gaga, I Kissed a Girl by Katy Perry.**

**Disclaimer: nope i don't own -man. :(**

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><p>~~~Ovo~~~<p>

It was another normal dreary day at the Black Order Headquarters. The halls were empty and echoing silence. Little tired yawns popped from exorcist and finder's mouths alike. It had been a while since anyone had slept a night without the mare.

The mood in the cafeteria was subdued; the only clearly audible sounds were that of Allen's monstrous consumption rate.

Kanda frowned at his soba – not that his foul mood was ever to do with the soba – and ignored everyone as usual.

'Mornin' Allen!'

'Hey Lavi,' the white haired boy managed between mouthfuls of steak.

'Ohh Yuu-chan!~' Lavi's grin widened considerably as he pretended to only just catch notice of the dark stiff person sitting beside Lenalee.

You see, Lavi had a fever. Yes, he was hot, bothered and absolutely Gaga.

'Hey Yuu-'

The classic Death-In-Half-A-Second-If-You-Don't-Shut-Up-Now glare emerged, imaginary Mugen already sparkling in Kanda's sapphire blue eyes.

'Don't call me that.'

'I want your horror…I want your design,' Lavi smirked.

Kanda ignored him, and scowled heavily into his soba as the annoying eyepatched rabbit continued to sing.

'Coz you're a criminal as long as you're _MINE_. I want Yuu's love.'

_Damn the rabbit for his stupid puns_. Kanda frowned deeper.

Lavi had jumped up on the bench now and was singing loud – and slightly off tune – karaoke to the entire cafeteria.

'LOVE LOVE LOVE I WANT YUU'S LOVE!'

Kanda stood up to leave. He was halfway to the door when the baka usagi reached the chorus.

'I want your love-' Lavi glomped Kanda, 'and I want your revenge!'

_You want revenge?_ Kanda let out a yell of annoyance and in a split second, he had seized the red haired singer-wannabe by the collar and was pressing the blade of Mugen into his neck, furious as Kanda always was.

Lavi leaned in as close as he dared, 'Yuu and me could write a bad romance.'

Half the finders were sidling towards the far wall, afraid that Kanda's response would be a massive explosion similar to a Komurin drinking coffee.

There was a silence filled with only Lavi's quick breathless intakes of air and Kanda's enraged heaves.

'Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh~'

Everyone held their breath.

'_Caught_ in a bad romance!

Lavi somehow managed to bunny his way out of Kanda's grip and began tearing down the corridor at top speed. The long haired samurai sprinted after him in a full blast rage. The dining room exhaled in relief. Explosion or no explosion, at least they weren't going to be in the near vicinity.

Grey and black walls whooshed by. Lavi chuckled to himself as he dashed down the hallway, the air whistling in his ears. He could sense the silent but very, very mad Kanda right behind him. He took a sharp turn into a little corner and waited, catching his breath.

Kanda narrowed his eyes in the darkness of the night, _where had that bastard gone?_ His footsteps slowed to a prowl. He wanted to hunt that idiot out and chop him to pieces for such public embarrassment. Kanda smirked as he contemplated all the ways he could make the rabbit scream.*****

Lavi heard his beloved bad romance slowing down and grinned evilly like a Cheshire cat; his teeth glinting in the moonlight and the rest of his body hidden by shadows.

'You know that I want Yuu,' he breathed seductively as a tall outline with a sharp, shiny long object prowled by.

Kanda spun on the spot, instantly slamming the hilt of his sword into a soft shape in the corner. The shape grunted 'ow' in a most amused way.

_Ugh… should've known that would happen. _Lavi laughed inwardly, clutching his stomach.

The point of Mugen caressed his throat almost lovingly. Lavi slyly wove around it and seized Kanda by the neck, pulling the samurai's ear up to his mouth.

'You know that I need Yuu.'

Kanda resisted the shivers that ran down his spine.

'I want it bad, bad romance.'

There was a small silence between them, listening to the darkness. Kanda was calming down, listening to his own heartbeat. That is until…

'Ne Yuu?'

'Baka usagi! Don't call me that, ever!'

Lavi chuckled again, 'You know there's no one here, and even if there were, they wouldn't be able to see us in the dark.'

'So? You're sti-mmpf!' Kanda's death threat went to nothingness as Lavi lifted the former's perfectly sculpted chin with his long slender Bookman fingers and kissed him quickly.

As he pulled away with a sly grin on his face, Lavi noticed the light tinge of rosy pink on Kanda's cheeks in the dim moonlight.

But Lavi wanted the last word of course, purely because he was Lavi.

'I kissed a girl,' he affectionately pecked Kanda's lips again, 'and I liked it.'

You'd think Lavi was suicidal.

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><p><strong>AN: ****hi how was that? lame? epically fail? **

***it's up to you how you think here... it's for my innocent readers and those thinking a little further as well. **

**anyway i was _really _bored. and i heard _Bad Romance _on the radio so yeah. **

**thnx for reading :) R&R? :3**

**oh and i realise the lyrics might have been out of order or incorrect because i just took the ones that seemed to fit in and i'm not that proficient in Lady Gaga.**


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